Our Initial Instinct
Today we are facing many uncomfortable feelings that might be hard to deal with. Spring of 2020 has certainly brought more fear, worry, and even anxiety into our lives.
How can we deal with these uncomfortable feelings? Our initial instinct is to pull away from them. However, this is not always the right choice. By avoiding these uncomfortable emotions we might actually be pulled away from things that are really important to us. It might also lead those emotions to get even bigger.
It’s never been a better time to learn how to deal with fear and other so-called negative emotions.
Think back to the last time you experienced a negative emotion. What did you say to yourself? Did you try to rationalize it? Maybe you tried to minimize your fear or were even judgmental towards yourself because of it? All of these reactions are our natural tendencies. In fact, we might even start to be afraid of feeling fear. Negative emotions build up when they’re not dealt with and when we judge them. Even though this is our automatic instinct–it’s exactly what we want to avoid!
So what are the best strategies when dealing with fear? Elizabeth Gilbert in her book called “Big Magic” uses a metaphor of a fear monster driving in a car with you. She talks about how hard it is to actually get rid of that monster because no matter what we do, the monster keeps finding its way back into the car. The best tactic in this situation is to simply accept that the fear monster exists but avoid letting him sit at the front seat of the car and choose the music or the direction the car is headed.
Control Your Fear
We cannot let our fear to hold us back from what is important in our lives. We can learn to have some space from that fear. We can learn to remember that it’s only in the back seat of your car. You are the one who is running the show!
So acceptance plays a very important role in learning how to deal with fear. Remember, what you resist, persists. Therefore by accepting the feeling and developing “a relationship” with fear, you will actually diminish its power to overwhelm you.
There are numerous other strategies I use when working with my clients that have proven to work wonders in learning how to deal with fear. Watch my video below, learn these strategies and start feeling like you too can deal with fear.